When I was 3 years old I fell off of the porch onto the cement and broke off my 2 front teeth. If that wasn't bad enough I had to have what was left of those 2 teeth pulled out by our dentist who for some reason didn't give me any anesthetic. I developed quite the lisp after that which I had until sometime in 2nd grade or so. I was terribly shy already and this made me more so. I never wanted to answer questions in school so the teachers thought I wasn't very bright. They sent me to a reading recovery teacher who was supposed to teach me to read. Imagine her surprise when I could read and comprehend perfectly. She continued to work with me anyway to boost my self-confidence. The lisp went away but when I actually started to offer answers in class the stuttering started. I was just so nervous that whenever I had to actually say more than one or two words I stuttered horribly. Needless to say, I wasn't exactly a social butterfly. I did manage to make some really good friends who didn't care about my faults and accepted me for who I was. (Thanks Karen. You were and are the best!) I didn't exactly love school but I was a pretty good student. I had to study my butt off for the good grades I got but I thought everyone did. Studying was difficult for me. I couldn't stay focused for very long on what I was supposed to be studying and often times would have to cram the night before for a huge test even though I'd try to study the material weeks in advance. Try doing that when your mind stays focused on one subject for about a minute and a half. Now, of course, I realize that I was struggling with ADD. I still do. I can't even sit and read for more than 10 or maybe 15 minutes at a time or I have to go back and re-read everything because my mind jumps from one thought to another to another even though I try not to let it.
High school wasn't half bad. I loved my teachers. They seemed to understand my struggle to succeed and the math teachers would often spend extra time trying to get my mind to comprehend what they were teaching me. English/Language Arts was super, super easy for me (not sentence structure but the creative writing and journalism part of it.) I thrived with the written word. It was my thing. I also loved being in plays and chorus. I never stuttered on stage. I was comfortable there. It wasn't me. I was the character I was playing. I was also quite a talented singer. I even sang solos quite often. I loved it.
Fast forward to radiology school. I was still quite shy which isn't exactly a good thing when you have to deal with doctors and patients everyday. I never had a problem with the patients. I really liked interacting with them. I always managed to make them feel at ease. I was also one of the best at putting in IV's and would quite often be asked to do the pediatric and geriatric patients. I never missed.
It took me awhile but I finally became comfortable interacting with 3 of the 4 radiologists I had to work with on a daily basis. One of them however made me SO nervous that I would stutter severely whenever I had to work with him. That kind of sucked. :)
I never quite fit in with my co-workers from the X-Ray department but I didn't really care because my main job was doing CT scans and the people in that department were awesome!
Fast forward to my life now. I know I skipped a lot of years but the stuttering eventually subsided for the most part except when I get really nervous and I found a job where I feel comfortable and needed. I am not the introvert I once was. Yes, I am still on the quiet side compared to a lot of people, but I LOVE my job and the kids I work with and my co-workers. I can be myself and not be judged because the kids kind of like my silliness and the fact that I treat them with respect and they know that I love them. I am also very, very good at what I do. I am not trying to brag. I am just stating a fact. People often tell me that it takes a special kind of person to do what I do. I don't know if this is true. I think it's the special kids at the school I work with who deserve the credit. They inspire me each and every day to do my best and be the best person I can be.
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